This painting is my visual representation of the song “Stop the Rain” by Tablo and RM. 

“When I was a kid
I was convinced that I was destined for the 27 Club, mhm
I’m twenty-nine, sinkin’ in the bathtub
Sippin’ gin, lookin’ for another club”
(~RM)

Once I heard these lyrics, I had a flashback...Just like RM, I was convinced I was destined for (in my case) the 19 club. I was sinkin’ in the bathtub, ended up 24 sippin’ soju, lookin’ for another club.
I felt lost for most of the time during these 5 years. I wasn’t supposed to be here.

Your 20s are supposed to be about figuring things out - but no one really tells you how slow and heavy that process can be. It’s like being dropped into a fog with no compass. Days blur into nights, years pile up before you even realize it. Everyone around you seems to be moving - graduating, succeeding, loving, building - while you’re just trying to breathe, trying to feel something that resembles purpose.

Some nights, I asked myself if I was falling behind or just standing still on purpose, afraid of the wrong choice. There’s this strange guilt in not having a plan, as if being unsure is a failure. But maybe it’s just part of being human... especially when you carry weight from the past that you never asked for.

That’s what this song held for me: not answers, but understanding. That kind of invisible pain, the in-between, the quiet desperation of wondering what to do with a life you didn’t think you’d still be living. And somehow, in all that emptiness, the song gave me enough to create again.

“Can’t run away from the pain
I’m tryna stop the forever rain.”

Walking alone in the rain, instead of running for cover, you just let it fall. Don’t stop the pain, accept it, and go through it.